I generally avoid using the word “deserve” and then I had an experience last week that gave me an insight into what deserve really means.
When I hear people saying “I deserve to be loved” or “I deserve to be treated better”, I usually sense they don’t believe they’re lovable or they have identified with low self-worth. My mind reasons that other people wouldn’t be taking advantage of them if they really believed they deserved love and respect.
The other thing that goes on in my mind is that the words “I deserve …” can be used as a way to get people to change their behaviour. The person saying the words “I deserve” could be trying to feel better about themselves by controlling what other people do or say.
When I read these words in A Course in Miracles last week, I had a deep insight into what I deserve.
“Remember that peace is your right because you are giving your trust to the strength of God.” Lesson 47. 8:3
The words immediately had an impact on me. My mind changed “is your right” to “deserve”, making it read:
“Remember you deserve peace because you are giving your trust to the strength of God.”
I realised I truly deserve peace when I choose to connect to my true strength. That’s a great reason to choose Love!
I realised I deserve Self-worth only when I remember where my true strength lies. When I don’t remember my true identity, I believe I deserve a whole different list of things!
“You deserve only love because you have given only love.” Text Chapter 13. In. 4:4 (Pronouns changed from “He” to “you”)
The problem is you believe that you have “given” something other than love. You believe you’ve attacked, you’re separate and that somehow you’ve messed up. You deny with those beliefs and then wonder why other people treat you in ways you don’t like. You say you deserve better but it’s just words. You’re really saying “I deserve life not to work out for me because of who I believe I am and what I have done.”
Then, what you get from people is not what they actually give you, but what you believe you deserve from them. So what message are you sending to yourself about what you deserve?
The great news is that you can believe the truth about yourself with the same amount of conviction that you gave to what is not true. Your choice to place your trust in a lie about yourself has enormous power. It tells you what you deserve. When you correct your mistake, you truly experience that “peace is your right “ and “you deserve only love”, because Love is what you are.
You deserve what you choose – that is the power of choice.