I have been aware of the “problem” of effort for some time.
Working hard to achieve something individually was a hallmark of most of my life. Recently I have been thinking of myself as being a bit “lazy.” For a while I have not been achieving or producing much. The feeling that I needed rest was mixed with the old ideas of wanting to push ahead and be creative again.
Over the last 18 months I have been in the process of letting the ideas of a new game flow into my awareness. The game is called “Revelation.” Sometimes I would wake up with thoughts that just came to me. I would act on them and then nothing would come for months.
Most of the time I had the deep sense that the game was already accomplished.
I believe we all have access to a state of unity where our ideas, thoughts, intuitions, and talents are accomplished in their fullness. I also believe that to some extent we’re always receiving from this place of unity which is not separate from us.
Was I ready to let the ideas flow though me and out into the world? That would be the step of fully expressing who I Am.
The question was not “Am I ready to receive?” but “Am I ready to receive so that I can give and in the giving realize the fullness of who I Am?”
The block for me was effort. I was tempted to apply effort to the process and so make a new creation into an individual achievement. But in unity there is no individual achievement!
You now exist within a shared consciousness. The pattern of a shared consciousness is one of sharing in unity and relationship. There is no pattern within it for learning (which is individual), for individual gain, or for individual accomplishment. T4:12.24
A couple of days ago a new friend shared a dream in which she saw people playing a game based on A Course of Love, the players were in a dialogue and sharing together without anyone being a teacher or a facilitator. The next day Catia (my wife) causally asked me for the English version of the new game cards so that they could be translated into Portuguese (we have a Portuguese speaking workshop happening in a couple of weeks). Hmm, I had this old unhelpful belief: the game is not finished and more effort is needed to complete it. I had played it once with 3 friends and although pleased with the outcome, it wasn’t the experience of revelation that I knew could happen through a game.
These two little nudges were enough for me to be willing to begin the step of giving the game to the world. It was time to allow a new expression. Expression of Self has no room for effort or shyness. No room for old patterns.
After staying up late one evening, followed by being in a flow for 7 hours the next day, a version of the game was ready. All without a sense of effort. There was a feeling of focus and the game felt complete although I had not play tested it. The block for me was not about receiving but about being willing to allow expression of my Self without effort.
If you are trying hard, pushing some project to completion, or tired from ongoing effort, then stop! It’s time to let what is already accomplished to flow though you rather than achieving yet another individual creation.
Effort is only a layer of defense, a stop gap between what you would receive and what you would give in which the ego once made its bid to claim ownership. Effort, as translated by the ego, was about turning everything that was given into what “you” could only work hard to attain, and thereby claim as your individual accomplishment. Obviously, union is not about this. While the ego is gone, effort remains, and while it remains, you will not realize full access to what you are given. D:Day5.22